Blogging it out…bullying, what are we really teaching our children?

*Please note, since writing this the school is in the process of issuing a formal apology to the young man involved and the children are writing sorry notes. My first instinct was to decline, but this issue is one to be remembered and I believe their fresh approach immensely wise.*

Because of the seriousness of this article, I am posting it as my monthly addition to the Insecure Writers’ Group…

Dear Parents,

Your accounts and accolades of our youth on social media can only make them picture perfect. And what an unrealistic example or achievement is this in turn for our children to even fathom they have a chance of living up to. We teach these beautiful souls how to treat themselves and others. The excuse, excuse, of recounting children being children when misbehaving is a direct reflection of taking ZERO accountability in our role of educating them.

#WeAreTheDifference #StopBullying #SpeakOut #AllLivesMatter

 

1st I’d like to say my heart bleeds as I write this. Every day, everywhere this occurs to all-time severities in which we’d rather bury our heads. WE as human beings owe it to each other to care about one another, a responsibility beyond being selfish, how what WE say or how WE act effects those around us, especially when it comes to our youth.

My child, your child, our children can all wear this ugly cap named-

Recently, I attended a fabulous afternoon at the park. Absolutely, amazing. After brushing the play-yard sand from my eyes, I realized a more severe situation was underfoot, and the reason why my efforts branding Send Sunshine has reason to find it’s way to the classroom during early education, the earlier the better.

A major factor in child-rearing is missing. Empathy. 

I wonder if we asked our children if they’d even know what it means?

em·pa·thy – noun – 1. the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

Kindness, where have you gone? Why do we condone unacceptable behaviors toward our fellow humans? Old or small? Heralding a green light for abuse, a shameless activity, to continue? Empathy should come naturally but is missing, why? Because we have excused it away.

The issue is so close and personal that I can’t even find the right words to express my disheartening experience amongst the children we are raising. For a person who in most cases can type things out with a modicum of ease, I am at a loss.

Beneath clear skies and false-protection of the sun, a genuine issue was taking place right before my eyes, and while the initial problem got lost in translation, the ensuing events were vivid.

A small group of boys, I’d like to be cordial but let me make the situation clear, bullies, at the park on a school outing decided to mark another much younger man, the victim, as their target and weren’t going to stop harassing him even after being asked several times by adults, not their teachers, to leave him alone.

Let’s consider this for a moment, what is …

ha·rass·ment – həˈrasmənt,ˈherəsmənt – noun
aggressive pressure or intimidation.

i.e … following him relentlessly, yelling, name calling

& bullying …

bul·ly1 -ˈbo͝olē – verb – gerund or present participle: bullying
use superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants.

i.e … gathering more than one party to give chase, aggressive behavior

When the bullies, after more than an hour, realized they weren’t going to be able to single out the victim because adults were keeping a close eye on him, the bullies called in their alpha team. The older boys. Who in turn summoned the lady squad, both units sent out scouts to circle the play-structure like hawks, ready to pounce if they found their single target alone.

Fed up, I informed the oblivious-kind-hearted teachers of the illicit acts and intolerable treatment from the students toward their fellow human being.

When the main aggressor’s mother arrived to pick him up, she coddled the boy as though he’d been the one victimized. 

The situation compounded itself by the response of the staff, a more puzzling case since ADULTs, non-judgemental eyes and ears witnessed what was taking place, but let’s ask those in fear of being reprimanded, the bullies, on how the witnesses perceived their actions.

Hypothetical response without adult intervention…“I understand my student bloodied this child’s nose, but what caused him to use such aggression? Let ‘s ask him?” ignoring the one person whose nose is bloodied and laying on the ground circled by half of the entire student body.

Passive and ridiculous. In case someone needs reminding…

pas·sive – adjective 1. accepting or allowing what happens or what others do, without active response or resistance.

The next day the issue was addressed by the teaching staff, not how the bullies behavior could have everlasting effects on the young man they pursued, but what they could have done differently? the group expressed sorrow they didn’t seek a teachers assistance. 

Do I live on another planet?

Why do you think? they are children in need of proper guidance. No immediate apologies were forthcoming to the boy they harassed, in their eyes they did nothing wrong since excuses were readied for them by those in charge of rearing them.

#ENOUGH…Let’s make no more excuses and save the lives of our innocents…#WeAreTheDifference

StopBullying.GOV-

Stop Bullying on the Spot!

“When adults respond quickly and consistently to bullying behaviors they send the message that it is not acceptable. Research shows this can stop bullying behavior over time.

Parents, school staff, and other adults in the community can help kids prevent bullying by talking about it, building a safe school environment, and creating a community-wide bullying prevention strategy.”

Again..it really isn’t that difficult to be aware and CARE for each and every one of us.

Write on-<3 Jess